Three

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. (Psalm 139:13, 14 NIV)

Harper Jane Krost arrived at 9:02 on November 6, 2013 weighing 7 lbs. 6 oz. and 20 in. long. 

She is perfect.  She is calm and snuggly.  She looks right at you when you talk to her.  She understands the difference between night and day and behaves accordingly.  She tolerates her sisters' (and dog's) affections.  She does not make a peep when riding in the car. Which is good, because we're in the car a lot.  

The girls are doing so well.  Maddie transitioned into the role of biggest sister overnight.  She gets up for school by herself and helps her younger sister get started on breakfast.  She wants to hold Harper and is very quick to help mom change and dress her.

Ava has been feeling some feelings about not knowing how to be a big sister. She's been pushing boundaries and is seeking attention, even negative.  Call it "middle child syndrome."  But with extra snuggles and consistent discipline she's back on track.  She loves helping push the stroller and sitting next to Harper's seat in the car so she can keep an eye on her while mom or dad drives.

I am healing well from my c-section. It's hard to be still and rest when there's so much to do to keep our new family of 5 running smoothly.  My mom (aka Nana Judy) came to stay for the last 9 days and allowed me to focus on establishing a good breastfeeding relationship with baby Harper. Next week will be a real test as Todd will be back to school and I'll be on my own with all three girls for 48 hours.

We are so blessed to have three beautiful and healthy daughters. Thank you for your prayers. Thank you also for your calls, cards, and kind words.  

Truly Scary

Halloween is my least favorite holiday.  This surprises no one who knows me, as I've never been a big fan of dress up, although I enjoy indulging my girls' love of glitter and tulle.  

We don't do the scary/gory/occult stuff in my house.  I try to steer the girls toward literary or TV character-related costumes (within reason, of course).  Maddie was going to be Pippi Longstocking but instead opted to be Saige, the American Girl of the Year.  Ava started October wanting to be Rapunzel but switched to Doc McStuffins (a female doctor from Disney Junior) instead. No problems there.

But costume choices for little girls are getting worse every year.  Pick up a costume catalog or party store flyer and try to find something appropriate for your 8 year-old daughter. Here's what I'm talking about. 

Image taken from CostumeExpress.com.

Scary stuff. When did Halloween become such a sexualized holiday?  Dressing up is a fun and creative activity.  So why all the sex?  

I grew up in a Catholic home, so Halloween often included putting together a costume of our favorite saint for the feast of All Saints Day on November 1. I dare you to try to be sexy while dressed as the Blessed Mother or St. Joseph.  

Halloween has somehow become about "good girls gone bad" for one night each year.  For college girls or the occasional mom's night out, I suppose I understand the draw (but I don't support it). Trouble is, I'm not sure why my 4 year-old needs to "go wild" for a night.  She's 4, wild is her default setting.  

But the deeper question is this: Why is my child's sexuality such a commodity?  Why would we choose to put her body in the spotlight, when God created her to be so much more? 

Can't I just get my peanut butter cups and Kit Kats without having to be half naked (and probably freezing)?!

Oh yeah, about that chocolate...

Here's my other problem with Halloween.

Child labor chocolate.  Read about it here: http://feedly.com/k/157Xvgk.

I like chocolate.  But a few years ago when Ava was diagnosed with a tree nut allergy, I began being more ingredient- and label-conscious.  That's when I discovered chocolate's dirty little secret.  

As the above article explains, Hershey, Mars, and Nestle--which account for nearly all the Halloween chocolate in your child's trick-or-treat bag--get their cocoa beans from farms in West Africa which employ many children, some of which have been sold into slavery, in terrible working conditions.  Hershey, Mars, and Nestle do not own the farms and therefore do not assume any responsibility for the conditions there.  They are only concerned with getting their beans at the lowest possible price so they can make a profit on you, dear consumer.  

So this year we went with non-candy treats to pass out at home.  They are little coloring book packets with crayons and stickers. Best of all, they cost exactly what I would have spent on candy.  

If this speaks to you, here's a link to an article with tips about how to have an ethical Halloween:

http://www.rageagainsttheminivan.com/2011/10/ideas-for-ethical-halloween.html?m=1.  

I don't mean to take away from anyone's Halloween fun (too late?).  But I've learned that my desire to have a good time shouldn't oppress someone else's rights, either.  

How does your family handle the sexy costume problem?  And what treats will you be handing out this year?  

Summer and Fall Bucket Lists

Yeah, we're a bit behind, I know.  But here's our completed summer bucket list:

Pretend that the "go to the farmer's market" box is checked off.  We never got around to reading a book under a tree, although it sounds lovely, doesn't it?

Here's what we've got planned for the fall.

Much of this will probably be completed before baby #3 arrives in early November.    But we can't wait to start making memories as a family of 5!

What's on your fall bucket list?

33 things I've learned

I turned 33 this week. I know, I'm old.  I prefer "experienced" or "wise". So I decided to compile some of the "wisdom" I've gained over the years.  It was a short list, but an important one.  Much of it has come since becoming a mother.  You just see the world differently when you're responsible for someone other than yourself.  

So, here we go. 33 things I've learned:

1. God loves us.  We don't deserve it and we could never earn it, but His love is there just the same.

2. Love always wins, even in the darkest moments.  

3. Kids' laughter is the best sound in the world.  

4. Fair is not equal. 

5. Someone out there would be happy with much less than you have.  

6. The public library is a remarkable resource.  Use it.  

7. Lower your expectations.  Sometimes just keeping yourself and your family alive is enough.  

8. The world can be a scary place.  Bad things will happen. Be brave.  

9. Sometimes a walk around Target with a Starbucks drink and no kids is all you need to feel like yourself again.  

10. Cloth diapering isn't that hard or gross. 

11. Minivans are a necessary evil.  Just go with it.  

12. Invest in a good diaper bag and decent bras.

13. Look people in the eye when you speak to them.  When someone is speaking to you, do the same.

14. Drink more water.

15. Read.  

16. Turn off the technology for a little while each day.

17. You cannot do it all by yourself.  This is not a sign of weakness or defect in your character, it is just a fact.

18. Education is never a bad investment, no matter what your bank account says.

19. People judge you far less than you think they do.  

20. Give grace, even when you don't want to.

21. Sometimes all you can do is plan for the worst and hope for the best.  

22. "The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice." --Peggy O'Mara

23. The most growth happens outside your comfort zone.

24. Don't only hang out with people who agree with you.  It's important to interact with people who have differing opinions.

25. Travel as much as possible.  There's a big wide world out there.  

26.  You do not know what people's lives are like behind closed doors.  Be kind and gentle.

27. There's not a lot you can control in this world except how you react to things.  

28. There is beauty everywhere.

29. Spend some time each day in prayer/meditation/Bible study.  

30. When everything feels like it's falling apart, start counting your blessings.  

31. Eat more vegetables.

32. Do not measure your worth in things.  

33. Marry someone who makes you laugh.  

And one more for good luck:

34. Love is a daily choice.

What wisdom would go on your list?

A Beautiful Mess

This year's MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) theme is "A Beautiful Mess".  I am on the Bureau County MOPS steering team this year as the publicity chair, which means I've been out and about sharing the MOPS message and theme with lots of ladies in the past few weeks in preparation for our first meeting of the 2013-2014 year, which was held Tuesday night.  

The theme has been very well received. Most of us moms have been waiting to hear this simple truth: our mess is beautiful, because Jesus loves us and has plans for us. He is using our mess to refine us into the moms He wants us to be.  In fact, this year's Bible verse mirrors this message:

  (Image taken from pambooher.com)

Anyone else needing to hear this lately?  

My proudest moment from our meeting on Tuesday was showing an iMovie we created of our "beautiful" messes. Each member of the steering committee submitted pictures of real messes of her house and kids. 

Beautiful Mess (2) from Christina Krost on Vimeo.

It is our goal this year to inspire our MOPS moms to live transparently and to give each other grace and encouragement.  And we do that by being real and honest. None of us ever really has it all together, no matter how much we try to make it look like we do.  We all struggle with something, though our struggles may differ. Having a support system of other moms can make those struggles easier, or at least less isolating.

I encourage any mom who has kids from birth through end-of-kindergarten to find a MOPS group.  Go to MOPS.org to find a group near you!